Sex Quotes

Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination.

Bill Watterson, Calvin in "Calvin and Hobbes".

It is easier to talk about money - - And much easier to talk about sex - - Than it is to talk about power. People who have it deny it people who want it do not want to appear to hunger for it and people who engage in its machinations do so secretly.

Smiley Blanton

My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror.

W. Somerset Maugham

I know nothing about sex because I was always married.

Zsa Zsa Gabo

Being a woman is of special interest to aspiring male transexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football.

Fran Lebowitz

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Woody Allen

If I ask a woman if she has suffered sexual harassment, could this be considered sexual harassment?

Sally Forth, Jan. 28, 1991

Sexual pleasure is, I agree, a passion to which all others are subordinate but in which they all unite.

Marquis de Sade

For certain people after 50, litigation takes the place of sex.

Gore Vidal

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at.

Jimmy Demaret

A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other... until death do them join.

Elbert Hubbard

Soldiers who are not afraid of guns, bombs, capture, torture or death say they are afraid of homosexuals. Clearly we should not be used as soldiers; we should be used as weapons.

Anonymous, Letter to the Editor, The Advocate

Bisexuality automatically doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Woody Allen

The only unnatural sexual act is that which you cannot perform.

Alfred Kinsey

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Woody Allen

If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to?

Bette Midle

Marty This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth of this band cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry.

This Is Spinal Tap

Philosophy is to the real world as masturbation is to sex.

Karl Marx

Programming is like sex one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

Michael Sinz

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

R. D. Laing

Sex is the tabasco sauce which an adolescent national palate sprinkles on every course in the menu.

Mary Day Winn

A promiscuous person is someone who is getting more sex than you are.

Victor Lownes

Chastity: the most unnatural of the sexual perversions.

Aldous Huxley

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

George Burns

Darling: the popular form of address used in speaking to a person of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the moment recall.

Oliver Herford

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation... The other eight are unimportant.

Henry Mille

Whatever else can be said about sex, it cannot be called a dignified performance.

Helen Lawrenson

There is not one in a hundred of either sex who is not taken in when they marry. It is, of all transactions, the one in which people expect most from others, and are least honest themselves.

Jane Austen

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.

Fran Lebowitz

Is sex dirty? Only if you do it right.

Woody Allen

If male homosexuals are called gay, then female homosexuals should be called ecstatic.

Shelly Roberts

Chastity always takes its toll. In some it produces pimples; in others, sex laws.

Karl Kraus

An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.

Terry Pratchett, Hogfathe

The mind is not sex - Typed.

Margaret Mead

Sex is part of nature, I go with nature.

Marylin Monroe

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.

Steve Martin

Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you thought of nothing else if you didnt have it and thought of other things if you did.

James Arthur Baldwin