Mark Twain Quotes

Mark twain - there is no sadder sight than a young pessimist....
Mark twain - adam and eve had many advantages, but the...

All say, How hard it is that we have to die - - A strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live.
Mark Twain
Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
Mark Twain
What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight, what counts is the size of the fight in the dog.
Mark Twain
I can live two months on a good compliment.
Mark Twain

Time cools, time clarifies no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours.
Mark Twain
Mark twain - most people are bothered by those passages of...
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.
Mark Twain
Heaven goes by favour. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
Mark Twain
Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.
Mark Twain
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Mark Twain
When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.
Mark Twain
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.
Mark Twain
His ignorance covered the whole earth like a blanket, and there was hardly a hole in it anywhere.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
Mark Twain
Language is a city to the building of which every human being brought a stone.
Mark Twain
In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.
Mark Twain
I never let schooling interfere with my education.
Mark Twain
A man is accepted into church for what he believes - - And turned out for what he knows.
Mark Twain
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.
Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.
Mark Twain
It is easier to stay out than get out.
Mark Twain
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.
Mark Twain
It could probably be show by facts and figures that there is no distinctively native American criminal class except Congress.
Mark Twain
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain
When you cannot get a compliment any other way pay yourself one.
Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Mark Twain
We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.
Mark Twain
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.
Mark Twain
At the beginning of a great national change, the patriot is a scarce man: scorned, ridiculed and forgotten. When his cause succeeds, however, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
Mark Twain
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
Mark Twain
Everything has its limit - - Iron ore cannot be educated into gold. - 1906.
Mark Twain
Eloquence is the essential thing in a speech, not information.
Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.
Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain
It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain