Mark Twain Quotes
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.Mark Twain
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.Mark Twain
I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.Mark Twain
A lie can travel halfway round the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.Mark Twain
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.Mark Twain
The billiard table is better than the doctor.Mark Twain
When I was fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have him around. When I got to be twenty - One, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.Mark Twain
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.Mark Twain
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.Mark Twain
George Washington as a boy was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth - He could not even lie.Mark Twain
It is the difference of opinion that makes horse races.Mark Twain
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.Mark Twain
Man will do many things to get himself loved he will do all things to get himself envied.Mark Twain
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.Mark Twain
Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.Mark Twain
Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.Mark Twain
Imagination is always the fabric of social life and the dynamic of history. The influence of real needs and compulsions, of real interests and materials, is indirect because the crowd is never conscious of it.Mark Twain
Familiarity breeds contempt - And children.Mark Twain
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race and finish the farce.Mark Twain
I cannot keep from talking, even at the risk of being instructive.Mark Twain
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.Mark Twain
Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.Mark Twain
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.Mark Twain
Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.Mark Twain
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.Mark Twain
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.Mark Twain
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.Mark Twain
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - - And stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit on a hot stove lid again - - And that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.Mark Twain
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.Mark Twain
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.Mark Twain
At the beginning of a great national change, the patriot is a scarce man: scorned, ridiculed and forgotten. When his cause succeeds, however, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.Mark Twain
Some people get an eduction without going to college the rest get it after they get out.Mark Twain
I have a prejudice against people who print things in a foreign language and add no translation. When I am the reader, and the other considers me able to do the translating myself, he pays me the quite a nice compliment - - But if he would do the translating for me I would try to get along without the compliment. A Tramp Abroad, 1880.Mark Twain
