Mark Twain Quotes

Mark twain - forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet...
Mark twain - i am prepared to meet anyone, but whether anyone...

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence - - And then success is sure.
Mark Twain
A lie can travel halfway round the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
Mark Twain
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.
Mark Twain

Eloquence is the essential thing in a speech, not information.
Mark Twain
Mark twain - friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this...
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - Either by themselves or by others.
Mark Twain
Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than on all other days of the year put together. This proves, by the numbers left in stock, that one Fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so.
Mark Twain
The miracle, or the power, that elevates the few is to be found in their industry, application, and perseverance under the prompting of a brave, determined spirit.
Mark Twain
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.
Mark Twain
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
Mark Twain
Youth, large, lusty, loving - Youth, full of grace, force, fascination. Do you know that Old Age may come after you with equal grace, force, fascination.
Mark Twain
It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake.
Mark Twain
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be - A Christian.
Mark Twain
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
Mark Twain
The holy passion of Friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
Mark Twain
Fleas can be taught nearly anything a congressman can.
Mark Twain
His ignorance covered the whole earth like a blanket, and there was hardly a hole in it anywhere.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
Mark Twain
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill always came together, who would escape hanging?
Mark Twain
If we had less statemanship we could get along with fewer battleships.
Mark Twain
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre but they are more deadly in the long run.
Mark Twain
All schools, all colleges have two great functions to confer, and to conceal valuable knowledge. - Notebook, 1908.
Mark Twain
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
Mark Twain
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
Mark Twain
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
Mark Twain
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.
Mark Twain
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession.
Mark Twain
Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.
Mark Twain
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.
Mark Twain
The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.
Mark Twain
Carlyle said, A lie cannot live; it shows he did not know how to tell them.
Mark Twain