Mark Twain Quotes
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of congress but I repeat myself.Mark Twain
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.Mark Twain
It is the difference of opinion that makes horse races.Mark Twain
His ignorance covered the whole earth like a blanket, and there was hardly a hole in it anywhere.Mark Twain
I have a prejudice against people who print things in a foreign language and add no translation. When I am the reader, and the other considers me able to do the translating myself, he pays me the quite a nice compliment - - But if he would do the translating for me I would try to get along without the compliment. A Tramp Abroad, 1880.Mark Twain
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.Mark Twain
Describing her first day back in grade school after a long absence, a teacher said, It was like trying to hold 35 corks under water at the same time.Mark Twain
An enemy can partly ruin a man, but it takes a good - Natured injudicious friend to complete the thing and make it perfect.Mark Twain
A man with a new idea is a crank - - Until the idea succeeds.Mark Twain
Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him until he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.Mark Twain
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.Mark Twain
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.Mark Twain
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.Mark Twain
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.Mark Twain
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes - - Or needs to.Mark Twain
We owe a deep debt of gratitude to Adam, the first great benefactor of the human race: he brought death into the world.Mark Twain
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.Mark Twain
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds upon the heel that crushes it.Mark Twain
There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.Mark Twain
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.Mark Twain
Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.Mark Twain
I was born modest. Not all over, but in spots.Mark Twain
Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.Mark Twain
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.Mark Twain
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it....Mark Twain
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.Mark Twain
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.Mark Twain
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.Mark Twain
All say, How hard it is that we have to die - - A strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live.Mark Twain
Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.Mark Twain
I cannot keep from talking, even at the risk of being instructive.Mark Twain
