Mark Twain Quotes
Somewhere between the Angels and the French lies the rest of humanity.Mark Twain
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.Mark Twain
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.Mark Twain
Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.Mark Twain
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.Mark Twain
There are times when one would like to end the whole human race, and finish the farce.Mark Twain
Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned. - Notebook, 1898.Mark Twain
All schools, all colleges have two great functions to confer, and to conceal valuable knowledge. - Notebook, 1908.Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.Mark Twain
I never could tell a lie that anybody would doubt, nor a truth that anybody would believe.Mark Twain
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill always came together, who would escape hanging?Mark Twain
The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.Mark Twain
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.Mark Twain
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.Mark Twain
We are always too busy for our children; we never give them the time or interest they deserve. We lavish gifts upon them; but the most precious gift, our personal association, which means so much to them, we give grudgingly.Mark Twain
I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.Mark Twain
When in doubt, tell the truth.Mark Twain
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow - Mindedness.Mark Twain
Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principle one was that they escaped teething.Mark Twain
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.Mark Twain
Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.Mark Twain
Principles have no real force except when one is well - Fed.Mark Twain
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.Mark Twain
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.Mark Twain
Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.Mark Twain
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.Mark Twain
I never let schooling interfere with my education.Mark Twain
Religion consists of a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain.Mark Twain
There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.Mark Twain
It is easier to stay out than get out.Mark Twain
Sacred cows make the best hamburgers.Mark Twain
It is noble to teach oneself, it is still nobler to teach others.Mark Twain
Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours.Mark Twain
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.Mark Twain
In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.Mark Twain
