Mark Twain Quotes
When in doubt, tell the truth.Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.Mark Twain
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds upon the heel that crushes it.Mark Twain
Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody.Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes - - Or needs to.Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.Mark Twain
Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned. - Notebook, 1898.Mark Twain
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours.Mark Twain
I did it partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do it again.Mark Twain
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.Mark Twain
The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.Mark Twain
There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.Mark Twain
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.Mark Twain
When you cannot get a compliment any other way pay yourself one.Mark Twain
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.Mark Twain
If you take a dog which is starving and feed him and make him prosperous, that dog will not bite you. This is the primary difference between a dog and a man.Mark Twain
At the beginning of a great national change, the patriot is a scarce man: scorned, ridiculed and forgotten. When his cause succeeds, however, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.Mark Twain
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence then success is sure.Mark Twain
The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.Mark Twain
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.Mark Twain
It is noble to teach oneself, it is still nobler to teach others.Mark Twain
Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him until he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.Mark Twain
Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.Mark Twain
Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.Mark Twain
When I was fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have him around. When I got to be twenty - One, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.Mark Twain
On his deathbed Death, the only immortal who treats us all alike, whose pity and whose peace and whose refuse are for all - - The soiled and the pure, the rich and the poor, the loved and the unloved.Mark Twain
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.Mark Twain
October is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. Others are July, January, April, September, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.Mark Twain
It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.Mark Twain
A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be led by the nose.Mark Twain
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.Mark Twain
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre but they are more deadly in the long run.Mark Twain
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.Mark Twain
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.Mark Twain
In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.Mark Twain
