Mark Twain Quotes

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.
Mark Twain
Mark twain - humor is the great thing, the saving thing. the...

The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.
Mark Twain
He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.
Mark Twain
The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
Mark Twain
Mark twain - get your facts first, and then you can distort...

A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be led by the nose.
Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
Mark Twain
Mark twain - the holy passion of friendship is so sweet and...
I cannot keep from talking, even at the risk of being instructive.
Mark Twain
It is discouraging to try and penetrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it out and dance on it. That would take some of the rigidity out of it.
Mark Twain
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.
Mark Twain
Somewhere between the Angels and the French lies the rest of humanity.
Mark Twain
If we had less statemanship we could get along with fewer battleships.
Mark Twain
Sacred cows make the best hamburgers.
Mark Twain
Time cools, time clarifies no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours.
Mark Twain
In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.
Mark Twain
A lie can travel halfway round the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
Mark Twain
There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.
Mark Twain
Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.
Mark Twain
Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him until he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.
Mark Twain
George Washington as a boy was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth - He could not even lie.
Mark Twain
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence then success is sure.
Mark Twain
The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
Mark Twain
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
Mark Twain
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
Mark Twain
On his deathbed Death, the only immortal who treats us all alike, whose pity and whose peace and whose refuse are for all - - The soiled and the pure, the rich and the poor, the loved and the unloved.
Mark Twain
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.
Mark Twain
We are called the nation of inventors. And we are. We could still claim that title and wear its loftiest honors if we had stopped with the first thing we ever invented, which was human liberty.
Mark Twain
Go and surprise the whole country by doing something right.
Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.
Mark Twain
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
Mark Twain
Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessaries.
Mark Twain
Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than on all other days of the year put together. This proves, by the numbers left in stock, that one Fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so.
Mark Twain
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
Mark Twain
The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.
Mark Twain
Tomorrow night I appear for the first time before a Boston audience of 4000 critics.
Mark Twain
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
Mark Twain
Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.
Mark Twain
Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
Mark Twain